Rebecca Tillett: Photography & Design Photography & Design2016-01-07T14:03:59Z http://rebeccatillett.com/feed/atom/WordPress Rebecca Tillett <![CDATA[For the Earth Beneath]]> http://rebeccatillett.com/?p=3074 2016-01-07T14:03:59Z 2016-01-06T19:48:09Z

When I fell in love with you
I prepared for battle
I held my heart between my teeth
Until it was tough and impenetrable
Like a wanting calloused fortress
Yours to lay siege to
yours, yours, yours

When I fell in love with you
I went to war
Cloaked in leaves and clay
Watching you from behind the trees
Ravenous for the earth beneath your feet
To be the branches in your hair
ravenous, ravenous, ravenous

When I fell in love with you
I ached for mutiny
To conquer you, your spring in the lull of winter,
Your undulating exterior and galaxy mosaic
Dancing across your face
I wanted for revolution
wanted, wanted, wanted

When I fell in love with you
I surrendered
To the vessel containing you
Bounding beneath a butchered landscape
Above the streams of slaughtered hearts
I conceded to longing and gasping
for you, for you, for you

—r. tillett

(Click any of the images to see them larger)

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Immeasurable gratitude to the luminous Chelseigh Rose for gracing my camera lens with her unwavering and captivating beauty and femininity last month, especially outside in the snow in freezing temperatures and half naked. The lengths my models will go to in the spirit of creating something beautiful and lasting with me never fails to bring me to my knees. Thank you, my dear.

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Rebecca Tillett <![CDATA[Serenica Landship]]> http://rebeccatillett.com/?p=3063 2015-12-22T17:51:57Z 2015-12-18T16:39:51Z Serenica Landship

On November 8th, Mike and I purchased a beautiful used RV, a 1996 Raven XL with less than 50 thousand miles on it. The sellers (the wonderfully sweet Hendersons) were only the second owners and had kept it garaged the entire time they owned it. They also took immaculate care of it and so in many ways, it feels brand new. It is outdated, however, which isn’t surprising since it’s a ’96 so we have big plans to renovate the interior to modernize it as well as make it ours, this spring and summer.

This will be our home for a while.

Our condo lease is up in July. If we manage to get everything done before then (including shedding most of the possessions I currently own) and can find an RV park to live in for a few months (I have a B.A.S. to complete by next December), we’ll move into it. If not, we may sign one more lease at the condo and move in the following summer.

I’m not yet sure where life will take us in this beautiful beast (dubbed the Serenica Landship for anyone curious, a nod to two tv sci-fi ships and a pretty great episode of a hilarious animated Fox series I won’t name because let’s be honest, there’s so much entertainment in making people guess), but I’m okay with that. The road is enough. The road is beautiful. The road is host to so many fantastic possibilities. There’s something thrilling and freeing about embracing the unknown, about being tied to nothing but each other, about movement and escaping a static and stationary presence. I suppose there’s something poetic in acknowledging the forward motion of life in such a literal way.

Most importantly, however, I’m doing this because it terrifies me. Don’t misunderstand me. it’s excites me, but it also scares the shit out of me. It is a daunting task trying to shed the skins of so many past lives; everything we’ve been taught to do and say on our misguided American paths to happiness. I am challenging myself to rise above 33 years of good-intentioned but ill-advised indoctrination. I don’t doubt that I’ll feel homesick for roots and stability and for the many things I gave or sold off to lighten the load but I think every now and then, a purging, both literally and metaphorically, is an absolute must.

I’d like to document the interior renovation here so if you’re interested in coming along for the ride, check back or subscribe to this blog. And if you’ve ever done something similar and have some words of wisdom you’d love to share, I am all ears. In fact, I insist.

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Rebecca Tillett <![CDATA[Brandon, Kristin, and Adalynn]]> http://rebeccatillett.com/?p=3039 2015-10-31T23:52:26Z 2015-10-31T23:52:26Z Little girls are truly magical, aren’t they? Well, that’s my opinion since I don’t personally have one and thus get to run away laughing maniacally into the sunset when the impressive temper tantrums and glistening little girl tears start flooding the streets of Denver. Seriously though, this particular little girl, Adalynn Perry, is adorable beyond words, even when such frightening things are happening around a childless person like myself (which is rather rare to never with little AP here). I would be a terrible mother, I think, as I would be so preoccupied with the fluctuating levels of adorableness that I wouldn’t be giving the appropriate amount of fucks to why my child might be upset. “What could you possibly be so upset about?!” I’d question enthusiastically. “You’re so damn cute!” Anyway, I digress. As I’ve mentioned here before, child and family shoots are not typically my area of expertise if that wasn’t already screamingly obvious (they require much more patience than my normal naked lady shoots, you see) but my closest friends apparently know how to sway me into doing it. And though quite challenging, I’m always pleasantly surprised by the results.

Below are some of my favorites from our shoot last weekend. (Click the images to see them much bigger!)

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Rebecca Tillett <![CDATA[Team Dunnero]]> http://rebeccatillett.com/?p=2986 2015-10-13T16:41:54Z 2015-10-13T16:41:54Z In the years it takes to double our lifetimes from the onset of our days as silly teenagers, I’ll watch you profess your love and devotion to a lucky gentleman with a handlebar mustache on the banks of the Rio Grande, ablaze and glowing with the heat of the Fall desert sun. Your beautiful and brilliantly white dress, shimmering and dancing with each affectionate word you utter in the direction of impending and hopeful days, your relentless tears waging cyclonic wars behind the barriers of your reinforced but dampened eyes. Every word, a promise, every syllable a solemn prayer.

And I’ll bear witness to such an intimate moment, reveling in the gratitude that throughout the years, throughout every crazy decision we’ve made in our own lives we’ve kept the path back to each other uncluttered enough to walk it.

Congratulations to my beautiful friend, for cultivating such a beautiful day in unforgettable celebration of such a beautiful life and partnership.

Team Dunnero

Team Dunnero

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Team Dunnero

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Rebecca Tillett <![CDATA[AdobeMAX]]> http://rebeccatillett.com/?p=3025 2015-10-18T17:15:23Z 2015-10-07T20:35:49Z Homelessness

I’ve spent the last 4 days in Los Angeles for the Adobe MAX conference in downtown LA. When I presented my request to my employer to attend knowing we’re currently in the midst of a budget crunch, I made sure to do so with the cheapest options I could find. I opted for a cheap motel (at more than half the cost of the big nice hotels working in partnership with Adobe) and walked the mile and half distance each way to the conference every day. The walk was not scenic but it was beautiful. And it was sad. It was through some extremely poor/low-income areas and I lost count of the many mattresses and makeshift sidewalk homes I’d pass on my way each day, the piles of garbage, the struggling mothers all hurrying their kids to school down the block. And the contrast of such surroundings with the people I’d encounter only minutes later sitting in beautiful conference halls, working on their MacBooks, answering emails on their tablets and having conversations on their smartphones was jarring at the very least. The growing divide between the haves and have-nots is staggering. I was happy with my choices on this trip as they reminded me to be grateful each day, just for what I have, just for being there, just for the incredible opportunity. I never intend to lose proper perspective. Thank you, Los Angeles, for your hospitality.

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Rebecca Tillett <![CDATA[I ]]> http://rebeccatillett.com/?p=3021 2015-10-13T20:26:10Z 2015-10-04T20:23:33Z I <3 Venice

“There are darknesses in life and there are lights, and you are one of the lights, the light of all lights.”
—Bram Stroker

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Rebecca Tillett <![CDATA[Paddleboarding with Tara]]> http://rebeccatillett.com/?p=3016 2015-10-13T20:03:39Z 2015-09-20T20:01:10Z Paddleboarding

This has been one of the most fun and interesting trips I’ve ever taken (even if it was technically for work) and I couldn’t have spent it with a cooler chick.

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Rebecca Tillett <![CDATA[Redwood National Park]]> http://rebeccatillett.com/?p=2902 2015-09-13T01:23:34Z 2015-09-13T01:23:34Z This August I made my second trip to Redwood National Park, and so for the second time, I’m tasked with trying to describe the experience, an impossible but advantageous assignment. And even though it was my second visit, it almost wasn’t in that I saw it all again for the first time through my boyfriend’s eyes. The consternation emanating from him as he absorbed the engulfing scenery was very nearly tactual.

At my core, in the deepest recesses of my heart, I belong to the desert. My soul will always radiate the closer I am to home, to yuccas and lava rock, and mountains shaped like organ pipes, and the biggest and most colorful skies I’ve ever seen anywhere. Rain will never feel and smell as good to me as it does when it falls in the desert. I’m sometimes amazed by the memories that come over me at the simple recollection of sensation (although some of them troubled or filled with enough sadness to justify my long absence).

But I decided back in 2012 that if I could choose an adopted home, I would allow the coastal Redwoods of Northern California to claim me. Excluding home itself, I’ve never felt more at home anywhere else. I want to dissolve into the fog, I want to drown in the lushness, I want to sit on the edge of the ocean and watch for days, at the sheer bulk of water seemingly without end and lose myself in the beautiful beautiful uncountable words that always fall short of describing it. Water in such mass has always left me a feeling little uncomfortable, lonely, small, and empty but I wasn’t overwhelmed with as much austere emotion this time. Or I was but I endured it. Or I was but I embraced it.

There is nothing I can say about the trees to describe them to you if you’ve never seen them or found yourself in their presence. I hope you trust in my sincerity when I announce my satisfaction at that realization. It’s true. I’m so utterly contented knowing there are places in this world that lie outside the boundaries of articulated description, places you simply have to see and feel and experience to know.

I’m including so many more photos in this blog post than I ever have in past posts but that’s likely because, aside from Instagram, I really don’t share my photos online anymore, and I suppose there’s a little less joy in keeping them to myself.

[All of these were shot with my Canon 5D Mark III. To see any of these larger, just click ’em. To see photos from the trip taken with my iPhone, check out my Instagram account.]

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Rebecca Tillett <![CDATA[dark rabbit hole]]> http://rebeccatillett.com/?p=3019 2015-10-13T20:15:36Z 2015-08-17T20:13:40Z And I so understand what you mean about becoming complacent. I was just looking at a tremendous photographer’s portfolio on IG this morning and I realized I immediately felt…down? Defeated? Like a failure? Does that happen to you often? You mentioned thinking life could always get better. I think I suffer with that as well. It used to be on both a personal and professional level and now it’s only on a professional level (which is good) but seriously, I feel like I actively avoid success sometimes. Does that make sense? I just can’t seem to get on the internet anymore without stumbling on someone’s fantastic body of work and seeing that they’re somehow doing that for a living (no 9-5 bullshit). How did they do that? How did that happen? How come I’m working a mind-numbing job that’s constantly draining my creativity for hardly any money and they’re not? And then of course I follow that dark rabbit hole down until I reach the inevitable “well, it’s probably because I’m simply not that good” and that’s soul-crushing. And then I have trouble accepting that, so I reason that maybe it’s because I’ve really just never tried very hard (which is a fact in a lot of ways)…because I guess I’ve just always been scared of not having the reliable paycheck…no matter the meagerness of the salary. And then I sadly conclude it’s likely a combination of the two and I’m moved to tears.

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Rebecca Tillett <![CDATA[We are making photographs]]> http://rebeccatillett.com/?p=3013 2015-10-13T19:59:57Z 2015-08-13T19:58:06Z Making photographs

“We are making photographs to understand what our lives mean to us.”
—Ralph Hattersley

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